Merry Christmas!

Enjoy!

READ THIS NOW!

I've got something great to tell you all, or at least those of yout that might actually read this! One of my videos on youtube is the 94th most viewed video in the category of Non-profits/activism in South Korea. This is a first! I've never been on one of the most viewed video lists before, so it's rather exciting!

I'm sitting down in the commons at Delta right now. I just spent about two hours commenting on project for awesome videos, and about half an hour before that studying. But, that's not the point of this blog...there's this lady next to me...well not directly next to me that is asleep and snoring! arg! Hearing her snoring will eventually get on my nerves but hasn't yet.

Project for Awesome

GO PROJECT FOR AWESOME! Project for Awesome is a yearly movement away from normal youtube videos to videos about charity to decrease world suck. So lets decrease world suck even more this year! GO TO YOUTUBE AND RATE, FAVORITE AND COMMENT ON ALL PROJECT FOR AWESOME VIDEOS!

Recent conversation

So I found a conversation that my bell choir had about a year ago. Well, it wasn't completley a conversation, but more of a joke that someone pulled.

We start playing a peice that uses both bells and chimes. Someone picks up their chimes instead of their bells, and plays those. Dave (our director at the time) cuts us off.

BILL: Next chimes a charm!

Family Reunion picture

I just got this picture via e-mail thanks to my moms older sister. It was taken in early August 2008 during our family reunion after my moms moms 80th birthday party. We were on the deck where we were listening to music, dancing and drinking. My aunt Julie literally laid down on the deck in the middle of the little circle of us that were dancing, and snapped this picture. I think she took several others of us during the dancing, but this is the one I've seen. I thought I'd share it with everyone.

2008 in review

I was just thinking about the past year, and all the chaos that has happened since the beggining of the year. First off, I had a terrible winter 2008 semester, and realized that nursing is what I really want to do right now. I also had a job interview in January with the Great Lakes Loons (www.loons.com) for a food service position during the home games, and got a job there scooping ice cream, and making sundaes, bannana splits and ice cream cones. So I spent April through September at Dow Diamond scooping ice cream during home stands.

I spent time at church playing in the bell choir and working in the nursery where I chased kids around for hours on end.

Around July 4th, my parents and brother went on a trip to Wisconsin leaving me home because of my job. So I spent about a week home along, where I slept on the couch every night, watched the crappy Midland Fireworks, sent off a few fireworks of my own, watched way to many movies and too much TV, saw Wall-E in theaters twice, and worked Loons games. I also worked the Single A Midwest leauge all star game, and enjoyed it SOOO much. Then August rolled around, and it was time for the family reunion. My parents and brother left early to get there to spend time with my dad's parents since I had a couple games to work before my break began. I ended up driving the two and a half hours from Midland to Ludington where I took the four hour trip on the ferry across lake Michigan. Once in Wisconsin, my dad and his parents picked me up, and we went out to lunch. After lunch we dropped my dad's parents off, and drove the hour and a half to my mom's parents house. It was there that the reunion officially began with some tubing, and relaxing with books around the house. On the second day of the reunion was my mom's mom's 80th birthday party. That party was fun with all the drinking, food, music, family, and friends. During the party, seven of the cousins including my brother and I recited an ode we wrote for our grandma from memory.

In early september the fall semester began, and I began on the long road to becoming a certified Pharmacy technician. Since then i've also been working on writing a second screenplay, a novel, and worked at my school work, played in my chruch's bell choir and worked in the church nursery. I'm definatley looking forward to a new year, and new great memories that I'll be able to remember with a smile on my face.

In other quick, right now news, I'm sitting at Delta College, watching the school closings hoping that Delta Closes before my class is supposed to start so I dont have to go and can go home.

HappyCabbie

Okay, I just got some news via youtube about one youtuber that needs help right now. I have the link to the video as to what happened to him (HappyCabbie) so you can see it for yourself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMjRNlXV_fg

Go give him some love!

Blogging from class

Right now I'm sitting in class, writing this. I know...you probobly are wanting to tell me not to. But, today is a review day before our final exam on December 18th. We have a quiz on Tuesay. I really don't want to think about this, so I'm sitting here blogging. Maybe I'll even blog about some of what we're reviewing.

15 G x
___ . _____ = 15g .250=100x = 15g.250
100mL 250mL _______ = x = 37.5g
100



Yep. That's the kind of math I have to do. Pretty simple huh?

Cardage

I found a card I recieved for my high school graduation in my desk...here's what it says (the italics)

You write papers
you study papers
you research papers
you turn in papers
and when you're all donw,
they hand you a peice of paper!
Here's anouther for your collection.
Congratulations

SO that's what the printed part of the card said. My Aunt and Uncle who sent me this card wrote:
"Erin-
With great love and admiration for all your hard work and positive attitude. Best whishes"


Here's anouther card, this time from my former piano teacher after I helped out with a music camp during the summer of 2007. It reads:
"Dear Erin
Thank you for all your help with Joyfull Jubilee. I really appretiate how you just step in wherever you're needed-Did you know you would be helping with a dance? I hope you had as much fun as I did. It was amazing how it all came together.
See you soon!
Rae"

Here's anouther card I got reading:
"It is in hoping that we dream, in dreaming that we seek, in seeking that we find our life's desire. May all Your graduation dreams come true, and may all your tomarrows be beautiful. Congratulations and Best Wishes."

Anouther card from my stash of cards I recieved after my graduation:
"Happieness is a butterfly, which when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. Hawthorn"

"Alive"

"Cant escape the sounds of the city
the sounds of the horns and the screams
with the sky cold and grey
buildings left to decay
its a city of broken dreams
with the crash of the steel and hammer
fill my head with a rythm so pure
and the sounds of the street are alive with a beat
that make me hopefull and sure
in the flash of the world is alive with music
one saving deep in my soul
and the beat of the drum feels like heaven
my empty life suddenly whole
in a world that'll toss and turn you
you do what can to survive
so I dance
so I move
to a beat
to a groove
that all meant I feel alive
alive
all the people who live in the city
are struggling just to get by
though they dont have a lot
they accept what they've got
I would rather die
so I turn on the movie thats playing
night and day
in the back of my head
and I twist and turn
and I pray and yurn
for a life that I've never left
In a flash all the world is alive with music
one saving deep in my soul
and the beat of the drum
feels live heaven
my empty life suddenly whole
with only a dream to guide you
you've got to have passion and drive
so I spin
I dance
for a dream
for a dance
for a moment
to feel alive
alive
some people see things for what they are
a cop moving traffic
a roar of a car
but I hear a rythm
and I see a smile on the cop
who is busting i movie style
inside the gym guys are jumping rope
but i see a dance that fills me with hope
and thats how i make it through every day
by looking at it in a different way
in a flash
all the world is alive with music
beating in time with my heart
and the rythm, eletric
is calling to me
soon your new lifes going to start
though at times it can over take you
it doesnt mean you shouldnt try
to escape from the dark
make your move
leave your mark
dont give up
dont give in
let a new day begin
for now and forever
you'll feel alive
alive
alive"
"Alive" sung by Julie Reiber

I've fallen in love with this song. You can hear it on myspace. I have it on my myspace at www.myspace.com/soccermaniac

Here's a video of Julie Reiber singing "Invisible" which was written by Bobby Cronin. She's got one heck of a voice.
"Then I turned 8
oh my life was great
playing and dreaming..."

"Then came 13,
14 and 15...
16 was sweet
18 could compete...
I was to be the bride...
mother cried
pop was filled with such pride
my heart stopped
tell me why
it was my time to die
now Im stuck here
causing such fear
crying moaning and groaning
since Im all alone
mother lived 10 years more
after John died at war...
grace went next...
why was I ignored
anger fills my heart which lingers
help me find the light
as the haunter I am haunted
searching day and night
help me find
the love I lost when I died
I must confess
what no one did guess
empty from distress
worthless
I felt invisible
you see Mr. right
would often lie...
I tried to make him see
how much he needed me
but then accidently
I cut to deep
and I died
a suicide
he made me feel like I'm invisible
crying for help I'm invisible
I remain in vein
invisible
why am I still alone
invisible
why
tell me why
am I invisible
no chance to say goodbye
so I will always be
invisible."

blogtv

Go to blog tv, and search ppmusic2010. I'm going to start a "Show" at noon, but it could start earlier, so get ready to ask your questions!

I just checked out the featured recorded shows at blogtv, and I was featured during my 8:00AMish show!! How exciting!

My new obsession...with words...yes words

So I've had this odd obsession with words that started last night. I have no idea why this new obsession is with words. It just IS! Knowing me, this obsession is probobly going to only last for something like a week or two, then I'll move on to some new obsession.

So here are some of the words that, for some odd reason, I LOVE!

• Abandond
• Deserted
• Desolate
• Destitute
• desperate
• empty
• vacant
• negected
• lonely
• forsaken
• solitary
• shunned
• forlorn
• outcast
• rejected
• helpless
• unfortunate
• doomed
• abdicate
• relinquis
• truency
• vacancy
• deficancy
• Forge
• headway
• declaired
• intese
• burning
• cherish
• tresured
• ungodly
• unimaginable
• taboo
• overpowering
• uncommon
• exceptional
• unfamiliar
• exotic
• noteworthy
• unparelled
• harmony
• tender

I'm actually kind of hopeing this obsession lasts since it could come in handy with the things I've been writing latley.

I'm downstairs in the commons (at Delta) right now, and there are these three really loud girls sitting near me. Their being quite obnoxious...I'd really like to just go over to them and have them turn the music down, if not off, and get them to quiet down so I can actually hear myself think. Well, I only have about an hour before class, so I guess I'll put up with it.

I've got an interview at Sears tomarrow morning (10AM). I'll try to update this blog on Tuesday with how the interview goes, and if I got a job.

The next video is of Julie Reiber and Megan Hilty in Wicked doing "No Good Deed". One of Julies riffs part way through the song is AMAZING! The third video is of Marcie Dodd and Megan Hilty in Wicked. Marcie's hat is on sideways if you didn't realize, and her cackle is amazing. The fourth video is Julie Reiber and Megan Hilty from Wicked singing "For Good". At 5:12 you can see the tears running down Julie's face, you can also hear the tears in her voice several times. The fifth video is Megan Hilty and Marcie Dodd singing "For Good". I think this one is Megan's final for good before leaving Wicked LA to do previews of 9 to 5 in LA. She's currently back in LA closing the Wicked cast as Glinda before heading to New York to open 9 to 5 there. The sixth video is Marcie Dodd and Megan Hilty preforming "One Short Day" from Wicked. Notice the quick change they make and that they come onto the stage late. You can also see the mich on Marcie's hat. The seventh video is Marcie Dodd singing No Good Deed...i really like this one for some reason.

Contact...yes the movie

Because I can't. I... had an experience... I can't prove it, I can't even explain it, but everything that I know as a human being, everything that I am tells me that it was real! I was given something wonderful, something that changed me forever... A vision... of the universe, that tells us, undeniably, how tiny, and insignificant and how... rare, and precious we all are! A vision that tells us that we belong to something that is greater then ourselves, that we are *not*, that none of us are alone! I wish... I... could share that... I wish, that everyone, if only for one... moment, could feel... that awe, and humility, and hope. But... That continues to be my wish. Contact

Go check out http://www.thatgirliknew.blogspot.com/ for a post about California's prop 8, and a conversation I had with my dad about it.

Im a maniac...

Yeah I'm a maniac. I've got about an hour before class...and what am I doing? I'm blogging and talking with a friend on facebook. Funny how these things happen. I could swear that today has gone way to quickley. My class starts in just under and hour...and I'm not feeling like going to class at all.

So I was thinking about how many blogs I've written since I started this blog about 11 months ago. Only 11 months later, and I've posted a little over 100 blogs. I was looking back at my earliest blogs just now, and realized just how much I've changed. Between the time I first started this blog, and now, I've decided on a major (pharmacy tech), am almost done with school for at least a little while, am more ready than ever to move out of my parents house, and SO much more comfortable with myself. I have to say that since January of this year, I've come out to almost everyone I know as gay, and have become much more comfortable with myself.

This past summer I worked for the loons in Food Service. What an experience! The first few games I worked serving up sausages, and would go home smelling of them. Later in the season, I was moved over to the hand dipped ice cream, where I scouped the ice cream. By the end of the season, my right arm was much strong than the left arm because of all the scouping of hard ice cream I had done!

Weird how much changes in just a few months. I've got to get going so I can get to the F wing for class at six. I might post anouther blog on Tuesday, but I know if I will yet or not. Maybe I'll continue to look back on what I've been up to since I started this blog up and before.

A friend's not a cheap little phony creep
Or a jerk trying to make a deal
A friend is a person who, most of all,
Cares about what you feel;
And nothing is harder
Than learning a friend isn't real

A friend sends notes back and forth all day
And doesn't care that you can't spell
A friend knows you've got a crush on your teacher,
But a friend would never tell
A friend's outside waiting
The minute you both hear the bell

And if your heart is always breaking
Cause the world is just not fair
When you're at your worst
Your friend's the first one there
Giving you something to lean on
And that's what it means to be a friend

A friend won't smoke when she's in your room
Or laugh at the poems you write
A friend won't go start kissing your brother
The minute that you're out of sight
A friend is the person
You call sixteen times every night

And if your heart is always breaking
And you want to run and hide
When your hope is gone
Your friend is on your side

If someone moves in around the corner
And you want to show him you care
So you give him all your last month of vacation
And all of the time you can spare
But then, on the first day of classes
He acts like you're not even there,
Then he doesn't know
He doesn't know!
He'll never know what it means
To be a friend
From the broadway musical 13


I love these lyrics!

California's prop 8

I was watching the election results on Tuesday night/Wensday morning, and saw what happened with California's prop 8. I thought about it , and decided I wanted to find out what other people think about the whole gay marriage thing. Basically I want as many people to e-mail me their thoughts about what happened to California's prop 8, and gay marriage to me at MNNVmidland@yahoo.com

I'll then combine everyone's thought into a blog on here for everyone to see what everyone else throughout the world. If I get enough responses from throughout the US and the world, I'll be able to come up with a graphic showing how many people are for or against gay marriage in different areas.

So e-mail me at MNNVmidland@yahoo.com with your thoughts!

100th post

It's my 100th post here...this post probobly will be short considering I have to head of to class shortly (even though I really dont want to go!).

It's been kind of a long day between getting to school, studying for class, voting in the election, and trying to catch up on e-mails and other internet related things. I have been way to busy latley. I can't wait for thanksgiving when things will calm down, even if its only for three or four days.

Last night I had a bell choir rehersal. It was one of many rehersals between September and December. The weird thing about last night was that I finally realized just how close I've gotten to the other people that I play with. After the rehersal was done our director, Diane, had myself and a couple of other people stay after the rehersal. That was when I realized something...Diane said something about how when i moved during the rehersals from E and F four to Bflat and C 6 and 7, she expected me to ring the Bflat and C like I ring the fours (ring them so hard the Bflat and C would make our eardrums burst), but was amazed that I didn't. I hadn't really thought about how big of a change that is until Diane mentioned it. Becky (one of the other people I play with in the bell choir) also said something to me that kind of amazed me. She said something to the extent of that I wasn't just one of the youngest in the choir and hadnt been playing as long as some other people had, but also am at the same level as someone else in the choir. I can't wait for the thanksgiving eve service at my church--we're doing a mass bell choir with two or three bell choirs from the area which will sound amazing!

I noticed I havent posted here for a while, so it was time to get back into a habit of writing on here. Typical Erin style! I get good about posting here, then forget too for a while. I guess that's just life.

I've got my mid-term today, so I'm a little nervous as usual. I always get nervous just before my mid-terms. I'll survive somehow...just like I always do. I know I'll be out of town on November 1 and 2nd visiting my brother at Western Michigan. That'll be interusting since I havent seen the campus yet. I need to get going now to do some last minute studying for my class.

I'm back!

So my life has calmed down for at least this week. My teacher canclled class for this week since he's out of town, and couldnt find a sub. So this week (until about friday night) is rather calm and easy going, which is unusual.

As my close friends know, I'm a youtube addict. Just today, I found someone on youtube who's voice I have fallen in love with. He is an amazing singer, so I suggest you check him out. His site is:
http://www.youtube.com/user/goonieman86
I'm not sure which one of his videos I like the most yet. This next link I'm giving you is to one of his videos, which is great. I know it's not Christmas yet, but I've found myself listening to Christmas music starting around the time of Haloween the past two years (2006 and 2007), and I'm sure it is going to continue this year. So check out this song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHE4X7HFmTM
One of the things I love about youtube is that I have found so many amazing artists through it.

Dont forget to check out my other blog at www.thatgirliknew.blogspot.com!
Love ya!
Erin

In my personal life things have been going crazy. I'm still taking my class at Delta College, and am enjoying it. In my last post I wrote about love. It's amazing the number of things that have changed since I posted. Since then I've gotten over my first love, and fallen in love with someone else that is a definate possibility. That's where I'll leave it. Life sure does play a wild card on us sometimes.

What else has happened since my last post here? Let me see. I've done a lot of searching for my place in this world. I definatly have found a few places that I think I might belong. I can hardley wait to see if one of the places that I might work out. I sure do hope this works out the way I hope it will. I'll make sure to post something here as soon as I know if something falls through that could allow for some major life changes.

I've also found that I am beggining to look forward to the moment when a relationship definatley works out in my favor.

Oh the chaos!

Yes my life has been chaotic the past few weeks. I've been trying to update two blogs, going to class for six hours a week, doing my homework, studying for quizes, going to a bell choir rehersal, watching the season premiere of Greys Anatomy, watching part of the presidential debate, trying to keep up with the news, writing a screenplay, and babysitting. As if that's not enough I've had something spectaculare happen. I fell in love. I'm not even joking. Before I address this whole falling in love thing, I need to address anouther issue that I think I need to adress here.

I met Wendy years ago. It's really hard to know exactly when I met her, but we definatly met through church. We've both spent a fair amount of time watching our churchs mens slow pitch softball team. Over the years I was strangley fasinated by Wendy, but never quite knew why. I still really dont know why was so facinated by her at first. As I spent more and more time working in the church nursery, the more I realized just how neat Wendy was and still is. To put it bluntley...Wendy's married and has three kids, and I babysitt those three kids on ocasion. How weird. I'm in love with a lady that I babysitt for. How much weirder can it get? I guess I'll put up with being in love with someone I just can't have. I've kind of known over the years that this would happen eventually, and I'd have to deal with something like this. At least I can hope that someday I'll find someone who I fall in love with that isn't married, and they will fall in love with me. It's like what happened on Grey's Anatomy during the season premier this past thursay.

I'm off to check on the kids (the same three mentioned above). I bet their still fasinated by the episode of the cartoon spider man their currently watching! Adios!

Learning German

Learning German isnt easy. Nobody said it would be easy, but Im still working on it. Thank god for youtube videos in German. Thats always a great way to learn by using a german translator and youtube videos! This next section is only going to be in German, so if you dont know any german, you'll have to find a german translator, someone who knows English and German, or some way to translate it.

Mein Apotheke-Technologie-Programm in der Schule ist ziemlich gut bis jetzt gegangen. Der härteste Teil hat bis jetzt das allgemeine und Markennamen für die 100 ersten meisten vorgeschriebenen Rauschgifte gelernt. Das Lernen des Deutsches hat definatly gewesen eine lustige Brechung vom ganzen Studieren, das ich getan habe. Aber das Lernen, auf Deutsch zu schreiben, hat länger genommen. Ich bin contstantly das Aufblicken von Dingen (wie, wie man ausspricht und Dinge buchstabiert). Gerade nimmt das Schreiben dieser Abteilung nur auf Deutsch eine Weile, weil ich dont wissen alle Wörter, die ich verwenden wollte, so habe ich Hälfte die Wörter ausgesehen. Das Lernen einiger Wörter, und wie man sie ausspricht, ist eaisier dank des Überflusses an Videos / Audio auf youtube "von Schlecht" gewesen.

That took a while. I had to look up quite a bit of information just to make sure I got everything I wanted to blog about in german correct. Its a lot harder to do than I thought it would be, but hey...at least that forced me to start learning more German than just the lyrics to "Wicked".

9/18/08

Its been several days since my last post here on this blog. But, theres no way I can post on both blogs every day, keep a myspace up, keep a facebook up, read and respond to any new e-mails, and keep up with class to post on both blogs every day. Do go to my other blog (www.thatgirliknew.blogspot.com) to see my once a day (monday through friday) posts about my screenplay, remember my Wensday post is mostly about some "issue" I decide to blog about. If you have any issue you want blogged about, just comment and let me know. I will get to peoples ideas for issues eventually.

Earlier today I went out and bought my mom's birthday gift and a DVD for myself. I'm not gonna say what I got for my mom until I give it to her in early november on her birthday.

Class has been going great so far. The hardest part to this point has been learning the top 100 most prescribed drugs (both generic name and brand name, so its really like 200 names). It's hard to believe how quickly this year has gone so far. Time sure does speed up as you grow up!

I'll be back (hopefully sometime next week at the latest) with anouther update here, and by that time with at least a few mor posts on my other blog.

9/12/08-Superpills

Last night during my pharmacy tech, my teacher (who is a pharmasist) told us about one person who had come in to get their refill on their medication. There are things in some medication bottles to help keep the pills dry. This particular person said something to the extent of did you put the superpill in?. The person thought that little packet ment for keeping the pills dry was a superpill, and had actually been taking it.

9/11/01

9/8/08

This week I might start a new blog, but keep this one up. Im not sure if Ill do it yet.

_____________________________________________________

Its only been a half an hour since I made the post above, but have decided to start a new blog. I will keep this one up, and post from time to time. Im going to keep this blog going with things going on in my life, and the new one is going to have a specific purpose. Ill update this post when I get that other blog set up.

_____________________________________________________

http://thatgirliknew.blogspot.com/

As those of you who know me well may have noticed, the url of this new, sensitive issues blog, is the title of the first screenplay I wrote and finished in March of '08. There's a good reason for this. I've got some very sensitive issues that some people struggle with that I want to conqure in this blog, as well have a single place that I will post about the screenplay Im working on writing now. That will allow for me to blog on this one about other things going on in my life (school, work, home, friends, and family to mention a few.).

______________________________________________________

Okay, I've been updateing this post throughout the day, so as of midnight tonight, this post will be complete. Currently I have videos that can be found on youtube from the broadway musical and tour of Little Women. I strongly suggest anyone who love broadway musicals watch some of these videos. So many of the lyrics are beautiful as well as the music. Here is a video of an ameture verson of one song from the musical Little Women:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r5IKRgA19M8

Enjoy it! Its very well done.

As for tonight, I have a bell choir rehersal...the first one for this season! I am so excited for this season of my bell choir.

Looking Back

Sometimes I HATE HATE HATE COMPUTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just now, the window I had open with this blog decided it was going to shut itself down without me telling it too. Of course it had to do it when I had anouther video and a whole bunch of other stuff writen into my blog. SO I lost everything except the original post. Sometimes I just want to kill this computer. Sadley for all you readers, that means I had start over, and I wont put some of the details in that I did earlier because Im a little too frusterated with this computer right now.

If you want the lyrics, go find them yourself. Im not gonna put up with copy and pasting them in here, then having to get the spacing right again. The first time I heard this song, I felt such a strong connection to it. Probobly the favorite section of lyrics for me is:

"There's a life
That I am ment to lead
A life like nothing I've ever known
I can feel it
And it's far from home"

I'll just say that since May, I've known what Im gonna do with my life (Im finally figuring it out now after two years of school!!!). Im sure that once I finish the pharmacy tech program, my life will change dramatically, and I'll probobly be living a life nothing like the life Im living now. I keep getting this feeling that I'll be living in a big city, so if I blog one day about to a big city, dont be surprised!

Im sitting downstairs at Delta. It feels weird to be sitting down here again. The last time I sat down here, I finished my first screenplay, and was an emotional wreck. I was happy, excited, and sad. I was happy that I had finally finished it, excited that I could finally send it in, and sad that it was done.

As for the end of the summer--it didnt last long enough. Summer never lasts long enough. Yesterday night on my way home from working the last Loons game of the season, I was happy that the season was finally over, and sad that I probobly wouldnt ever see some of the people I work with again. It's such a weird feeling knowing that I might not ever work anouther seasonal job. Who knows?

Last night was the final game of the season. WOW! It feels like the season just flew by. It was kind of an emotional game for me since it was the final game, and probobly the last time I'll work for the Loons.Last night I wrote the lyrics for a couple songs I had in mind. I'm one of those writers who writes whatever I can hear first. Sometimes its the music first other times the lyrics come first. Here is the first set of lyrics I wrote:

Here I am
again
staring at the wall
again
woundrin where I go from here
what happens
now we're almost done
they took you from me
and put you at lemonaide
so Im standing here alone
woundrin how Ill cope
being so alone
just looking around
it looks so empty
will people see just me
or will they see who they want me to be
all they see is an employee
not a person who is in her last day of her job

Yeah...so that was the first set of lyrics I wrote with a specific melody that I already had written earlier in the summer. Ill share the other song I wrote last night later. During the last SUnday game of the season, I wrote a couple sets of lyrics. Here's the first set:

Is this the end
of who I am
and my life as I knew it
or will my life go on
just as it has for so many years

My life is changing and will never be the same
I wasnt who I was yesterday
and never will again
but life goes on
and life goes onjust as it always has
it will continue onas it has
'till everything changes.

The other set of lyrics from the final sunday game of the season are next. This set doesnt have a backstory...so if you want the backstory the this one, dont ask...there really isnt a story behind it besides being bored out of my mind at work.

Ever believed you'd stare at a wall
woundrin if someone would call
ever believed you'd stare at a wall
and try to find your voice
if you ever find it at all
you stand there alone
starin at the wall
woundring if youll find
where you belong in this world
Staring at the wallwoundring if youd find your voice
just staring at the wall
will you find your voice
in this lifetime
or in this world
as you stare at the wall

Next up are the lyrics for anouther song. The lyrics for this song have a uniqe backstory to them. I'm not sure if Ill share that backstory just yet. I will definatly tell you that I wrote them last night thinking about the people Ive met working for the loons, and the friends Ive made there. If Marj is reading this, she might pick up on at least one reference to someone we worked with at the loons. So here are the lyrics:

Im dreaming of you
we've worked together
we've stayed together
nothing has pulled us apart

Chorus:
Staying together
working together
together for always
loving for always

I miss seeing your face
every other friday
having you around
and seeing your face
was always a pleasure

Chorus
Im dreaming again
dreaming
of seeing you again
of sticking together
forever
looking back
at working together
at staying togetherat nothing pulling us apart

Yeah yeah yeah...I know...you probobly want to know what was going on when I wrote this. Its wild for me to read these again as Im typing them up, mostly because its almost like I knew I was going to dream about something that had happened at the loons during this season, but it was like I was working there again next season. I think Ill come back to these later and maybe Ill tell you the whole backstory then.

WOOO HOO!

Ive only got one loons game left!

"Im walking towards nothing
on this desolate road
Im searching for comfort
a place to call my own
Im scared of where Im heading...
when will I find the answers to the questions in my mind...
all I ever wanted
has sunk in the unknown...
if my life was different
if it was something i could change
I take that....
and turn it into strength...
if I own today"

from Scott Alan's song "If I Own Today"

8/27/08

Below is a note I wrote originally for a note on facebook. It was written and posted on August 25 2008. I thought I would post it here too, just in case people that read this blog dont read my notes on facebook. Its hard to tell who reads my blogs here and my notes on facebook, so if you read both you might see some repeated blogs/notes. As for whats going on in my life, things are about to gear up with my bell choir starting rehersals soon, and school starting the day after labor day.

It's been a while since I wrote a note on here...I guess thats just what happens when you get a blog that you tend to write on more. My parents left this morning at about 10 with my brother to drop him off at Western and move him into his dorm, leaving me at home. Im definatly enjoying the quiet right now. I've been watching a few original songs that people have written on youtube, and got inspired to write my own. Just dont expect me to sing it anytime soon. I thought I would share the lyrics with you in this note. I thought I would title it "It's a New Day after all".

Open your eyes sleepy head
Roll out of bed
stare out the window
its a new day after all

Here I am
Here I am again
staring out this window
the only change today
is what Im thinkin

Who am I
and what am I doin here
I've been wandering all these years
and I've finally found where I want to be

So I'll roll out of bed
rub those sleepy eyes of mine
look out the window
and run out the door
its time to great the new day
and a new dream
that is so close to comin true



There isn't a long backstory to this one like there is for some of the songs I've written over the past 2-3 years. It started off with something I heard a celebrity say recently. THey said that when they wake up in the morning, they think "Great! Anouther day!". Who knows...today could be our last day here on Earth, so I might as well apreatiate it. The third stanza sums up the past year and a half of my life. FOr quite a while I was really questioning what I was doing in Midland, and what I was doing with my life, hence the number of times Ive changed my major. Its been during this summer that I finally found what I want to do, and where I want to be.

8/25/08

Monday of the family reunion-
SOme Tubing and skiing happend with those of us that were left, along with going out for dinner, doing the wash, and mini golfing.

2007 themed pirates below:

2008 family reunion:

Those were just some of the pictures that were taken...

What else is going on in my world??? Not a whole lot...lets just say its almost time for school to start.

8/20/08

Well, I've been back from the family reunion for a week. What a time!

I got to the family reunion at about 2:30/3:00pm Michigan time, and absolutley enjoyed the chance I got to sleep on the ferry. Not a whole lot happened during the reunion on Friday.

Saturday-
Tubing and other various water sports. A grand total of seven of the cousins (including my brother and I) sat on the boat for an hour saturday morning writing a poem/ode that later would read during our grandma's 80th birthday party. After that hour we were stummed, so went tubing and super mabling for an hour or two, or however long that was. We would then go on to eat lunch up on the deck and finish the ode/poem in about 5 minutes. Its crazy to see how much a little tubing can help when you have writers block. Saturday night was the party. About half an hour before leaving to go to the party, the seven of us that had written the ode/poem had our one and only "official" rehersal out of sight and hearing range of Nanna. Throughout the party, we all enjoyed mingling with the friends of Nanna, and with our family. Most everyone 20 and older was drinking at least a little. I had 2 beers, and a glass of wine interupted with a can of Coke and some food. I was no where near drunk! We had one segmented rehersal in about 25 seconds to make our final preps for the ode/poem reading before we actually went in and did it (all by memory...every single one of the seven of us involved with it!). I later recieved an e-mail saying that even proffesional actors/actresses couldnt have had more stage precence than we did!

Sunday-
Some tubing, but not much, a lot of badmitton. Most every left that evening except my family and my moms older sisters family, making Nanna and buppa, my parents, my aunt Julie, and my three cousins, myself, and my brother the last ones at the lake. This prompted some games and other stuff.

Ill write monday later.

8/7/08

Well it's the seventh...and if you didnt already know I will be leaving early tomarow morning (aka by 4:30 am) to get to a ferry in Ludington so I can get to the family reunion! I am so excited for the reunion, and for the summer olympics. How much better can it get???

In other news:
Last nights Loons game was rained out, so tonight we have a double header (two seven inning games). Oh the joys of showing up for work at 4PM, and staying until they close the food service stand you work down. On a normal night (with only one game) Im at work from 5:20 pm until about 10 pm. But when theres a double header (like tonight) I arrive at 4pm, and will probobly get home around 11. Its a good amount of time to work, but when you have to be up at 3:30 the next day, its no fun being up that late. Tonight is Instant Vacation night, so we (the staff) can dress up like we're going on vacation. For me this means a hat that reminds my mom of giligans island, some sunscreen on the nose, a t-shirt from tahquamenon falls, a pair of jeans, and my normal shoes. Now if I only had sunglasses!!! That would make it even more vacation like...

I'm gonna get out of here now, and start making my way out of the library towards work...just what I would really like to be doing right now (NOT!).

Twitter account

http://twitter.com/ppmusic2010

Babysitting for some friends

Ive been at a friends house babysitting for the past hour and a half. Im babysitting their two kids and a friend of theirs. I dont know what time the friends parents (who I know) will turn up, or when their parents will return. The three kids have to go to bed at about 9 tonight.
Thankfully all three kids play together very well, which makes my job easy. Im sitting in the living room with them while they play mario cart on the wii writing this. It makes my life easy when I can write and watcha and talk to the kids all at once.

Screenplay update

So as many of you know I've been writing a screenplay. Well back in March I finished the first one. Recently I started writing a second one.

Heres an overview of the first screenplay:
Jennifer is your average Joe Smoe from Mid-Michigan, until she discovers her freak singing voice. She grows and learns so much as she learns more and more about where her freak singing voice comes from.

Here is an overview of the second screenplay:
(I'm currently working on writing this one.)
Sarah always knew she was different than most people her age. She grew up singing and acting, so the job she pursues in musical theater. When Sarah and Jennifer meet, they strike up a close relationship that turns out to be more than it seems.

• So thats where things stand with the overviews for now. You may have noticed that in both overviews I mentioned a character named Jennifer. The Jennifer from the first screenplay ("That Girl I knew") and from the second screenplay (which is still untitled) is the same Jennifer. I have several screenplays I would love to write about the same characters. Each screenplay will focus on a different character, as to show the full picture of what was happening in everyone's lives during the same 50 years or so. It'll be a challenge, but I havent given up yet.

I've already filled up one notebook with scenes I want to use in the screenplay Im currently working on, and have started a second one. I'll try to keep you updated with the happenings with these screenplays...although I dont know how productive Ill be.

Thats what Ill be

"Look at what Im given,
this beautiful creation,
this sweet intoxication,
somthing pure in my life
look at all these changes
and the light shines within me
and youll be mine completley
therell be no darkness left to view
I never knew this form of love existed,
and deep inside of me is where it all begins
so hold me in your heart
...
I'll protect you for always,
never feel alone
ill always be with you
home is where the heart is ment to be
youll always have a home inside of me,
and we
will walk this road together,
ill shelter you from burdens
just lean your weight on me
...
I never knew this form of love existed,
...
so hold me in your heart
...
Ill protect you for always
never feel alone
Ill always be with you
for home is where the heart is ment to be
youll always have a home inside of me
no matter where the journey leads you
if your path leads you somewhere new
youll always have a home in this heart of mine
so hold me in your heart
...
Ill protect you for always
never feel alone
Ill always be with you
the home is where the heart is ment to be
youll always have a home inside of me"
from "Home" by Scott Alan

I fell in love with this song the first time I heard it, mostly because of the beautiful lyrics. In the first little bit of the song the lyrics go "and you'll be mine completley, and there will be no darkness left to view". It's been over a year since I realized that I a story to tell. That story I have been telling for the past year is the one Ive been turning into a fictional screenplay. The characters in the story have always been "mine completley", and whenever I escape to their world, I am so happy and feel like the world is so bright. The lyrics "You'll always be with me" also ring true for these characters...they havent disapeared from my life YET! Once they entered my life, I knew that they would change my life for the better, and would always be with me in some form. I relate to every single character one way or anouther. In a sense I put a little peice of me in each character knowing that someone would relate to that trait in that character and be moved by what the character had to say. It's been a year since I started writing these characters stories, and Im no where near done. Best of all I know I can count on anouther year of writing about them and their stories. Even after Im done writing their stories, I know that they will still be with me, for each character has changed the way I look at things.

I really would love to write more right now, but I have to leave for work...love ya all...
Erin

Bummed out

Yes Im in a little bit of a rut right now. My friends and I have been trying to plan a weekend at one of our friends cottages on a local lake this summer for all of us to hang out. Today I heard the date that had been decided on, and it turns out that two of us (one being me) cant make it for one reason or anouther. It kinda sucks. Last summer we did one of these, but I was the only one who couldnt make it. Yeah...so im really bummed out right now. I know they arent trying to leave me out, but it sucks when you seem to be the only one who cant ever make it to the summer get together.

I guess part of the reason im so bummed is that going to a local community college that everyone commutes too makes it hard to make new friends. That and seeing most of your closest friends go away to college has made me wounder who i am, and who i was meant to be. In the past year or so I started realizing that I can write. My dad has said that i cant count on ever being published. I havent given up on that chance yet though. There are people I know who have read the screenplay Ive written and loved it. The stories and screenplays I have written and am writing seem to be the only things I've got right now too hold on to. They're the only things I've found that wont disapear.

Wow...

It's been a while since I posted. Since my last post, my brother graduated from High School, grandparents came and left, VBS at church happened, the minor leauge single A all star game happened, and the power chord for my laptop died. I just got a new power chord today, and I'm so excited that I am now able to charge my laptop, which was out of battery, and actually use it again!!!
I've got a surprise planned for my parents and brother while they are in wisconsin. AKA I have a few games while they are over there, so after the last game of the stand, I will go over to see them and grandparents as a fun surprise. I've told my brother what is going happen, so he knows.

Update

I feel like I havent blogged in forever! It's been a while, but Im still alive and kicking. The past week has been chaos with lots of baseball games to work. Last night I set up a BlogTV account for myself so that i would have anouther way to keep in contact with people (even the ones I dont know too well!). If you go to BlogTV and search ppmusic2006 you'll find me. I've got shows planned for June 20 at 1PM EST and 7PM EST, and July 4 at noon EST and 10PM EST. You dont have to have an account with blog tv to be able to watch or chat, so dont run away because you dont want an account. I'll try to post here again a day or so before the shows so people wont forget.

My days of Jello have returned.

Do you remember the days when you loved jello, grilled cheese and tomato soup for lunch? Those days have returned for me. My younger brother dislocated his shoulder several weeks ago. On Tuesday, May 20, he had surgery to repair a small tear in the cartilage. The past two days he has spent at home, and each day he has slowley gotten better. Yesterday he only felt lik eating a little bit of bread, lots of water, some jello, and some soup. Yesterday he puked all over his front because of the vicotin. Today he hasn't had any pain, and hasnt had any need for the vicotin which is great! Today he was able to drink a ton of water, eat some jello, some toast, soup, and some sprite. I just ate some jello for dinner before I leave for the Loons game (since I am working for the loons in food service.

I need your votes for a contest I'm in! Copy and paste the link below and vote for that video since it is mine!!!!
http://community.happyslip.com/Video/Happy-Slip/0CCEDFFFF00A011EA001700226E7F

Flops, screenplays, work, and concert series.

The whole blog a day thing hasnt worked out. I guess you could say I got lazy about posting. I don't know if I will ever post a blog every day...so dont expect it.

Screenplay update:
The first one is done, and I am still in the midst of writing the first six scenes of the second one. THis time I think Im writing a lot slower simply because things are more complex in the second one, so Im makinging sure i get everything right.

As for working for the loons, things have been slow where I have been working, but that is perfectly fine! We do have a game tonight despite the rainy weather, and Nick hasnt called me back. Thats weird. He usually calls me back. Thats okay, Ill see him tonight at work.

In other news, I am organizing a concert series here in Mid-Michigan. I need composers and vocalists that want to be featured in the concert series. There will be one concert a month, on a monday evening somewhere in the Mid-Michigan area. I seriously need vocalists!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If your interusted, then please e-mail me at MNNVmidland@yahoo.com and I'll get back to you withing 24 hours. I could care less about where your from, as long as you want to sing. So PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE get ahold of me ASAP if you want to be apart the the concert series. There will be five vocalists and one composer featured at each concert, I still dont have enough people for the first concert, so you might have a chance at being apart of the first one the sooner you get ahold of me!

Bay City Gathering

day 7

I'm sitting at a friends house baby sitting right now. There is a girl and a boy that I am babysitting. The girl is with a friend at a class. The young boy is here with me playing with his trains. This is great! I just sit here and watch him playing and write this blog. Best of all both of the kids are very well behaved. I always love babysitting these two because they are so much fun to work with. I've been really bad about posting the past few days but what do you expect?? I've been busy working on exams, but now that those are done, I can blog more.

RAWRG! Day 6.

I've been bad at posting daily!!! I promise I'll get better at it now that I have only one exam left (which I take this afternoon!). I know today isnt really day 6 of my attempt to do this, but it's my 6th post for it.

Exams are almost over!!!!!

Its almost summer!!!!!

I cant wait to go home after my final exam today!!!!

Is it summer YET?!?!?!?!?!?

Im heading to the Official Wicked Website to see if Wicked will be in Lansing this summer. If it is Im going to try to make it to the show once. Okay...Wicked will be in Lansing during July and August so I hopefully will convince my parents to let me go!

Day 5

Okay. I just posted what I was planning on posting yesterday but didnt have the time for.

Back to today.

The Loon's next home stand starts today and runs through Wensday. Cant wait to get back to work. Next week is exam week (YUCK!), but at least the semester is almost over. The weather is constantly improving, and has been very warm and sunny the past few days.

Today I spent two hours at the Delta fitness center. One hour doing cardio, and one hour swimming laps in the pool. I hope I'm sore tomarrow. But hopefully not too sore.

Day 4 (ment to be posted yesterday...but no time)

Very busy day today between classes, bell choir rehersal, and chimes rehersal. A little tired today, but glad the semester is almost over.

BONUS: Day 3 Pictures from the past.

BONUS DAY 3!!!!!

I didn't think I was going to feel like doing any writing today, after my original day 3 post. Who knew I would end up at the library working on the screenplay, and suddenly feel like blogging?? I definatly didn't expect that!

The first screenplay (the one I just finished a few weeks ago) had so many details in it that there was no way I could include everthing I wanted to. So I began writing the second one (the one I've been working on for a couple of weeks now). Since I've been at the library, I hit a road block with the screenplay I've been working on. So instead of sitting here staring at the computer screen, I logged onto AIM, and began working on anouther screenplay that I have written bits and peices of since January. I got one scene in and hit writers block there. At that point I came here feeling like blogging about all of this writers block stuff.

Evidently I don't have a complete writers block, because I just thought of something that I need to put in Coreen's screenplay, and NOW before I forget it.

I got it down! It always feels so good to get a new idea down on paper in a word document. Things have been moving VERY slowly with the writing because it has been so hard for me to find the time to write much of anything. I'm hoping that this summer, I can write as much as I did last summer if not more. If I'm lucky I might have half of the screenplay about Coreen written by the end of the summer. That's just if I'm lucky enough to find enough time to write.

It's time to wrap up this bonus version of Day three. I can't wait to see what I come up with in these daily blogs.

Erin

Day 3 bonus

Yipee!

Day 3

Yes it's day 3. I thought I had forgotten to do a post yesterday when I woke up this morning... but then I looked and realized that I hadnt forgotten.

I really dont feel like blogging right now, but am forcing myself to do it. What do I want to blog about? Absolutly nothing right now. I just want to SLEEP! I'm sitting on the couch in the living room again. That's no good.

Hmmm. The buds on the trees outside are getting bigger! YAY FOR SPRING! Why am I so tired???? I can't wait for summer.

Yeah. That's whats going on. I'm tired, I don't know what to blog about, my brain feels empty, and I want summer break NOW!

I guess I'll be back tomarrow.

I just thought of something. I'm not regreting posting the blog where I came out. I haven't gotten any responses to it, but it feels good to have it out there.

Yep. That's it for now.

Erin

Day 2

It's day two of my blog a day.

I can hardley believe that next week is exam week! I feel like it's still the beggining of the semester, but it's not.

I'm still working for the loons, and at my church's nursery, but and looking for a third job that I can also work to save up for college. College is so darn expensive these days that it almost takes three summer/seasonal jobs to pay for it.

I'm at the library writing this, and there is this homeless guy who hangs out here every day (at least that's what it seems like). It's kinda creepy because he's sitting just behind me, and has been for nearly an hour. On to more interusting things

Or maybe not more interusting things. The weather is continuosly warming up here. I am so excited for warm weather that it isn't even funny!

Yesterday I said that I had written one new scene on Sunday morning. Last night after my Day 1 blog, I typed it into the word document that I have saved for this screenplay. I kept it almost exactly as I wrote the scene originally, but did make a couple of minor changes to it. Most of the changes I made from hand-written to typed were additions, but there were parts from the original that I took out.

I can already tell you that with the screenplay I'm working on now, I have written the part that I had the most planned out. The parts I have written not only were the parts I knew lots of details about, but they also were some of my favorite parts. I've got probobly three more scenes to write that I have somewhat planned before I go and fill in the missing peices (aka about three quarters of the screenplay).

I forgot to mention in my last blog that my brother dislocated his shoulder just a couple days ago. He has been in some pain, but is slowley recovering from it.

There are definatly some unique characters around here today. A while ago there were a couple of people that gave me an idea for something in the screenplay I'm currently working on. They weren't too interusting, but they did distinctly remind me of the main character in this screenplay.

Homeless guy just left the area (FINALLY!). He was starting to creep me out a little.

I just had the chance to look back at everything I've written in this blog, and realized that I didn't have writers/bloggers block today like I thought I might.

Time for me to go back to work on my screenplay to figure out a little more of Coreen's life after and before Jennifer.

I should be back to write day three tomarrow, and hopefully will have something interusting to write about then too.

Erin

Day 1

Today is day 1.

Where do I want to start? What do I want to write about? I'm sitting in my parent's living room on the couch writing this. There's a large window behind the couch looking out into the front yard. There are two end tables...one on eaither side of the couch, and a coffee table in fron of the couch. On the other side of the end tables are pink chairs. Across the room from me is the piano. I guess the piano was one of my Mom's grandmother's pianos way back when.

Yesterday morning I wrote a new scene for the screenplay I am working on now (which is my second one). The scene works quite well considering I didn't have the scene that occurs directly before it, and that the scene I wrote yesterday ties in closley with the scene that is directly before it. Was that confusing? I hope not.

By the way...
In a previous post I came out to all bloggers/anyone who reads this blog. THis is somewhat evident in the screenplay I am working on now. Two characters are bi (who are strongly based off of myself), and the rest...are tolerant of being gay or bi.

That's all for today. I'll be back tomarrow!